Presenting Confidently – Top Tips for Managing Your Audience
1. Managing Your Audience
Hello, this is Madeleine Morgan from GrowU.
This is the second of a four post series on presenting confidently and skilfully. Last week I talked about four ways to manage yourself, build your confidence and create a confident impression.
This week I’m going to share with you some ideas for managing your audience and keeping your audience interested.
Because, most of the time, we get by in life with the reasonable communications skills most of us learned very haphazardly from parents, the playground and other things we’ve picked up randomly from life experience, we sometimes under-estimate the special communications skills we need to learn for career and business success.
This quotation from David Gordon gives us a useful and challenging warning:
He said: ‘Just because you are making a noise in my direction don’t assume you are communicating with me.’
Maybe you have some experiences that help you understand the value of those words such as – lost sales, failed interviews, luke warm responses to work presentations and audiences who just didn’t ‘Get it’.
With that in mind here are some useful tips:
Let’s start with some useful questions for you to answer about your presentation:
a. What is the purpose of my presentation – to inform, engage, enthuse, educate, impress, persuade, sell, get referrals? How will I achieve this?
b. How will I know if my presentation has been successful? Remember that presentations are more about how the message is received than about ‘broadcasting’ to your audience. The acid test of the success of your presentation is the action your audience takes as a result of it.
For instance, do they buy something from you or adopt a new way of doing things or bring you referrals or…? If your audience enjoyed your presentation but didn’t take the action you intended them to take then you need to rethink your presentation. I remember listening to a presentation on how to get more business by referral. He gave lots of useful tips but ended the presentation with a funny but irrelevant joke. I can’t remember the tips but I do remember the joke.
c. How can I establish rapport with my audience? This is important because people are more open to accepting your ideas if they know, like and trust you. Some ways to establish rapport are outlined in the points below.
d. What experience/knowledge/skill does my audience have in relation to the topic of the presentation? What do I need to do to ensure they understand and so feel engaged?
Through you (your body language, voice qualities, ability to summarise, live explanation, question answering etc) and PowerPoint, Role Play, Music, Video, Audience Participation etc. you have the opportunity give your audience a valuable, easily understood and interesting visual/hearing/feeling experience of your topic and make it easier for your audience to make use of the content of your presentation in the way you intended, e.g. to remember and implement.
e. How does my audience best understand and recall information? How should that influence my presentation style?
Research shows that while spoken and written communication is important most peope also need more help:
- 40% of people understand and remember information better when it’s presented visually – with pictures, graphs, diagrams, video etc.
- 20% of people best understand and recall information that is heard, especially when it is said with a variety of voice tones/speeds/expressions. This may also include other sounds such as music, sound effects etc.
- 40% of people prefer to be ‘walked through’ information step by step and/or have a practical/tactile/emotional experience of it.
f. Make use of metaphors and stories. We naturally learn and understand by comparing what we do know to something that we don’t know. Metaphors can help your audience understand in an instant what would take many more words to explain. For instance, when people ask me what I do I often compare the life and business coaching I do to what a sports coach does – like a sports coach I help my clients get great results through helping them improve their skills and/or changing their mindset. When I explain it this way people quickly understand the value of the coaching relationship in creating success.
They say, ‘Facts tell, stories sell’. Telling a story can be a great way of opening up your audience’s mind to consider new ideas and information.
g. What is the audience’s purpose in being there? What do they think they are there for? You may need to find out or explain that. Then you may need to explain early on in your presentation how your presentation fits with their purpose in being in the audience.
h. What is important to your audience? How will you address their key concerns, interests, etc.? For instance, are they interested in technical excellence, ‘green’ issues, innovation, exam success, in doing a good job and being seen as professional? Your audience will be most attentive and engaged if you are showing them how to achieve what’s important to them.
i. What are the beliefs and culture of your audience? How will you take that into account? For instance, are they suspicious of your profession? Are there common beliefs you’ll need to influence them to change?
j. Sometimes you have the unhappy task of delivering bad news. There are ways to do this in a positive light – for instance state what has been learned from mistakes.
Apparently a manufacturer once intended to create a hard glue that would stick things together permanently. The formula turned out to be too weak but another use was found for it and Post-it notes were born!
Are there any advantages to some of the setbacks that have been experienced?
k. When you have good news to report, make the most of it. For instance if you’re reporting on progress, mention the deliverable and then put the icing on the cake by mentioning the benefits and outcomes of achieving that. For instance, if a new website has been created for the project, what has that achieved in terms of marketing the project or how is it being used for the benefit of users? Case studies are useful stories to include here.
l. Handling questions – this is a huge topic but here are some tips.
- The best time to handle an awkward question is before it is asked because this gives you more control over the presentation and shows you are well prepared. That means you need to think about the difficult questions you think will be raised and give information that answers them in your presentation.
- If you can’t answer a question at the time you can say that you will find the answer and get back to them within an agreed timescale.
- Sometimes it’s suitable to throw the question over to the audience to get suggestions and ideas.
So, there are many ways to manage manage your audience and keep them engaged. I’ve covered 12 of them today very briefly.
If you want to find out more about confident and skilful presenting go to www.buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
If you want to find out more about sales presenting go to www.TheAccountabilityClub.co.uk
Next week I’ll be talking about techniques to help you manage the content of your presentation and avoid what has been called, ‘Death by Powerpoint’.
In the meantime, good luck with your presentations. I’d love to know how you get on
How to be Assertive in Relationships
The Confidence Coach
As a result of being one of the Chat Room guests on BBC Radio Cambridgeshire recently, it got me thinking...
We discussed 2 topics I thought were related. One was about how we felt about lending money to friends and family – could we live by the motto, ‘Neither a borrower nor a lender be’? The other was - what was our worst experience of having someone to stay in our home?
So how are those related, I hear you ask?
Well, what I realised was that those situations tend to be dilemmas for us if we’re not sure how, confidently, to set wise boundaries with people. Or if we are uncomfortable about dealing with people’s upset, or even our own guilt, when we do set boundaries. In fact that’s at the heart of many relationships we find difficult.
A common question my clients ask is, ‘How can I tell/refuse/ask……without upsetting them?’
The answers lie on lots of different levels. But here are a few ideas:
Remember that you can’t please all of the people all of the time. People become upset for lots of reasons – many of them you couldn’t be expected to guess. Instead of avoiding a conversation for fear of upsetting someone, get skilled at communicating effectively with that kind of person/situation and dealing with any upset that comes up.
For instance, if someone is upset about something you’ve asked them for or refused to give them, avoid becoming defensive. Try to have an open discussion about the real issues rather than about the emotions and the way they were communicated.
After all, if you avoid asking someone for something or to do something for fear of upsetting them, you never give them an opportunity to say, ‘Yes!’
Remember that you have a right to ask and they have a right to refuse. At the same time they have a right to ask you and you have a right to refuse!
Wouldn’t life be easier if we could be direct and assert our right to just ask or to just refuse?
For one of my coaching clients that belief system I’ve just described about asking and refusing just didn’t fit.
She came from a culture where if a member of the family asked for financial support she would give it, few questions asked. For instance, she was supporting a nephew to go to a very expensive college in the America and a cousin who kept wasting money and then finding himself on the breadline.
At the same time she had financial difficulties of her own because her business clients were late paying for her services.
Her belief that she should help her family was so strong that she felt guilty about refusing her family even though she had made her own luck in life and she was feeling very stressed by the financial state of her business.
The situation could only get worse because she was training her family to treat her like a bank.
One perspective that helped her was to realise that she could be more helpful to her family by asking curious and open questions that helped them realise how they could help themselves more. I call it ‘teaching them to fish so that they can feed themselves for a lifetime’ rather than ‘giving them fish which might feed them for only a day’.
The ‘win’ for her family members was that they enjoyed feeling more successful and the ‘win’ for her was she felt good about helping them find out how to be resourceful. She could also feel loved for herself rather than for her money.
Where in your life could you be creating a win-win by ‘teaching someone to fish’?
When you’re having family and friends to stay, think about how you can create a win-win situation.
I like to feel relaxed when people come to stay. One way I can be relaxed is by not having to second guess everyone’s needs. So for instance, I tell them that if they feel like having a hot drink, feel free to make one – they don’t have to wait for me to ask (Of course I do ask sometimes too). Or if they wake up before me and feel hungry – feel free to go and make some toast or get some cereal. My guests feel relaxed too because they don’t have to follow my routine all the time. Of course, we also plan to eat meals together as well.
How can you make sure that visits from your family and friends are win-win ones?
Please let me know how you get on or if you have any questions.
With 2012 here, I thought I’d give you a free tool to help you get clear about where you are in your life, where you’d like to be and how to get there. Just email me and I’ll send it to you.
Relationship Confidence – 7 Secrets to a Confident Romance
Confidence in Relationships – 7 Secrets to Confident Romance
The royal wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton has got me thinking about what makes a confident and fulfiling relationship.
Whether you’re totally indifferent to the royal wedding or a raving fan, it seems obvious that Kate and William are, in many ways, living the romantic dream. They’re wealthy, good looking, confident in each other’s love and make a great team.
It may be tempting to think that their kind of relationship is only for the privileged few. And it’s true that few people will have royal weddings but it’s also true that living the dream romance is more possible than most people think or experience in real life.
My own experiences of relationship pain, disaster and happiness gave me a passion to share with others what I’ve learned through experience and training about how how to create fun, passionate and happy relationships even when the relationship involves people with totally different personalities.
I’ve found out that many people are experiencing more pain than they need to just because there are some secrets, tools and strategies to creating a happy relationship they need to know – and are rarely taught.
Here are some of those secrets.
7 secrets to a confident and passionate relationship:
1. Confidence in Relationship Secret One - Choose someone who shares many of your hopes, values and dreams about life and relationship – it’s hard work in a relationship if you and your partner have very different ideas about what you want out of life. You’ll get caught up in resisting each other’s attempt to try and change each other. Know what you want and find out what they want, early on.
Nowadays people have more opportunity to find out if they are compatible before they get married than ever before. Yet 50% of first marriages and 75% of second marriages end in divorce. How can that be?
My experience of coaching over 900 clients is that they either ignore the instinct they have that this person is, at best, only 80% right for them. Or, a lack of skills and knowledge, some of which are mentioned in the tips below, kills off the chemistry.
2. Confidence in Relationship Secret Two - Be quick to praise the things you love and appreciate about them.
We’re brought up to think that people only improve and change if we criticise and point out when they make mistakes.
Yet, think about when you were a baby just taking your first wobbly steps.
Imagine if we’d been surrounded by people who had told us we were doing it all wrong, that we were underachieving and would probably never walk based on the evidence of our first struggles. I wonder how many people would still be crawling into middle age! Or be going into therapy because of a walking phobia.
I bet for most of you, the people around you praised everything about what you tried to do to walk – even when you lost your balance and sat down with a bump on your backside – for the 100th time. Maybe that’s why the majority of the people on the planet can walk!
Choose someone who is generous with their appreciation of you too. Be each other’s fan club!
3. Confidence in Relationship Secret Three – Talk about the things that bother you about your partner and the relationship.
You might think this tip is contradictory after what I said in tip 2.
Yes, if your partner has done or said something you don’t like, talk about it!
Avoid suffering in silent resentment because it kills off love and passion in a relationship. Avoid being intimidating, critical and interrogating while at the same time avoid being a victim, placating or distant. There are secrets to having those difficult conversations - the next 2 tips will help.
4. Confidence in Relationship Secret Four - When your partner wants different things from you, or has a different opinion, be willing to talk calmly about your differences. We are usually brought up to debate and that can be fun. But if you hold your ground too fiercely or reluctantly give in, you miss opportunities to understand each other better.
There’s a middle way. Sometimes it’s more loving, and exciting, to find out more about why they think the way they do before you bring your contradictory ideas. Avoid dismissing their ideas and wants too quickly – then they’ll be more willing to listen to you too. Have a win-win conversation.
5. Confidence in Relationship Secret Five - When difficulties come up think about your part in creating the situation.
For instance, if your partner is treating you badly, is there some way in which you’ve ‘trained’ them to do that either by ignoring their needs and wants or by trying to please them too much?
If you’re not attracting the right people into your life, what do you need to learn and change that will help you attract the romantic partner of your dreams?
The great thing about doing this is that your part is the only bit you’re in control of, the bit you can change and have power over. When you realise what you can do to change a situation, that’s very empowering.
We’re emotionally wired to go into flght/flight reactions in the face of relationships difficulties so I know this tip, while simple, is difficult to follow. My clients find that when you talk with an experienced relationship coach who can help you get the perspective, awareness and skills you need, in a supportive and objective way, it helps to speed up the journey to relationship success.
The next tip will also help.
6. Confidence in Relationship Secret Six – Heal the past. Most of us have had difficult relationship experiences - parents who have shown us very conditional love or ‘unloving’ behaviour, painful divorces and relationship breakups. We carry hurts from past relationships, sometimes without even realising it. This is baggage from past relationships can be too great a burden for your future ones.
Many clients I work with on their relationships have been through difficult childhood experiences, divorces and relationship break ups. They find they are slow to have confidence and trust in new relationships, even when they meet a really great partner, and find themselves sabotaging the relationship, without meaning, to in all kinds of unconscious and frustrating ways – big and small.
Once they’ve come to the point where they don’t want to be a hostage to the past, I’ve helped them clear the past, their confidence in relationship has increased and it’s easier to have the fun, passionate and loving relationship you really want.
7. Confidence in Relationship Secret Seven – Make Sure You Have Healthy Self-Esteem and Confidence.
My clients discover that when their confidence increases they attract other people with healthy self-esteem and confidence – like attracts like. Confident people make better relationship choices. Confident people are less likely to feel jealous and insecure in relationships. They don’t need to be right all the time and they don’t put up with poor treatment. They hold themselves and their partner to a higher standard.
All this may not sound very sexy but actually, long-term, physical passion and chemistry last longer when you follow these 7 secrets to confident relationships. 
I wish you all the love, fun and passion in your relationships that you can handle.
Warm wishes
Madeleine
PS: I like to reward people who take action to create more happiness in their lives. So, I’m offering you a free Discovery Session where we can explore where you are now in your life and relationships, where you’d like to be and how you can get there.
Contact Madeleine or phone 01223 964516 to book your session.
"Madeleine is an exceptional coach. Over the years I've received coaching from some of the biggest names in NLP, business and personal development. In my estimation she's up there with the big boys.
Very quickly she expanded my thinking way beyond the limits I had set for myself and not only gave me practical step-by-step advice that moved me forward in my career, my business, my personal relationships and my personal development. She also revealed to me the things I was doing in my head that were preventing me from enjoying the success I'd already achieved.
In a very short time, and as a direct result of Madeleine's coaching:
- My confidence soared
- I secured an interview for the job of my dreams
- I got really clear on a part-time business I wanted to build
On top of all this, the process, wisdom and expertise she brought to the coaching allowed me to make changes in myself that deepened my relationship with my girlfriend, improved my interpersonal skills with colleagues at work and most important of all, given me an ongoing realisation that this whole journey is exciting and enjoyable. Ben Green, Manager
The Confidence Coach
The Coaching Room, 44 Chesterfield Road, Cambridge, CB4 1LN
Building Self Confidence – Action for Happiness
Hi
I was listening to breakfast TV yesterday morning on the BBC and heard about a new charity called Action for Happiness.
Why would there be the need for such a charity? Well, it seems that the richer our society gets the unhappier we are!
That’s weird isn’t it? Surely we’ve got more to be happy about than ever – even with the recession on we still have a great material standard of living compared to millions of people in the world. We enjoy greater physical safety and there are more safety nets if our personal world falls apart than in many countries
Part of the BBC report showed various members of the public giving their ideas about what would make them happy. Their answers included: a bath, a fulfiling career, that it would suddenly be Friday afternoon and time to go home from work.
It struck me that all of their answers were around ‘I’ll be happy when…’ None of them were about how they could be happy in the moment. We can all relate to that. I know I feel more upbeat when the sun shines.
The trouble with the kind of happiness that depends on certain events taking place is - what if they don’t? Are we dooming ourselves to be unhappy for no good reason?
Here are some great antidotes to unhappiness my clients find really helpful and that you can start to use immediately:
- Build your confidence so that you can bounce back quickly after a setback.
- Learn how to create win-win discussions so that even if someone wants something different from you, or has a different opinion, you don’t have to get defensive and argue with friends, family, colleagues or clients.
- Practise speeding up the time it takes for you to turn your attention away from a problem and towards a solution.
- Keep a gratitude diary – find reasons to be happy and write down all the small and big things you are grateful for. If you can’t be reasonably happy, try being unreasonably happy!
- Express gratitude – let your family, friends, clients and colleagues know what you appreciate about them. Include yourself – you need to be your own best friend
- Have a motivating reason to live. My motivating purpose is to help people create even more abundance in their lives – an abundance of the good things in life such as joy, confidence, health, fulfiling relationships, love, rewarding careers and businesses and wealth. When I remember it, I feel very happy and it keeps me going even when I experience setbacks.
- Choose to spend your time with positive and supportive people. For instance, weed out any negative ‘friends’ and see a life or business coach regularly to help you get perspective, clear sense of purpose, master your emotions and clear the way to overcoming challenges and achieving your goals faster.
All these things are within your power and give you control over your life and level of happiness.
Create a happy day!
Warm wishes
Madeleine
PS: I like to reward people who take action to create more happiness in their lives. So, I’m offering you a free Discovery Session where we can explore where you are now in your life, where you’d like to be and how you can get there.
Email Madeleine at mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk or phone Cambridge 01223 964516 to book your phone, Skype or face-to-face session.
PPS: You can download a free confidence mini-course from http://www.buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
"Madeleine is an exceptional coach. Over the years I've received coaching from some of the biggest names in NLP, business and personal development. In my estimation she's up there with the big boys.
Very quickly she expanded my thinking way beyond the limits I had set for myself and not only gave me practical step-by-step advice that moved me forward in my career, my business, my personal relationships and my personal development. She also revealed to me the things I was doing in my head that were preventing me from enjoying the success I'd already achieved.
In a very short time, and as a direct result of Madeleine's coaching:
- My confidence soared
- I secured an interview for the job of my dreams
- I got really clear on a part-time business I wanted to build
On top of all this, the process, wisdom and expertise she brought to the coaching allowed me to make changes in myself that deepened my relationship with my girlfriend, improved my interpersonal skills with colleagues at work and most important of all, given me an ongoing realisation that this whole journey is exciting and enjoyable.
Ben Green, Marketing Manager
The Confidence Coach
Help with Confidence – Secrets to Dealing Confidently with Feedback
Hi
Have you ever asked for or just been given someone’s opinion – perhaps about a task you’ve done at work, some clothes you’ve bought, a dish you’ve cooked, a presentation you’ve made or an idea you have?
Was that opinion ever negative and critical?
Did you feel your confidence was undermined by it?
If so, I’ve got some great secrets for dealing confidently with feedback to share with you.
Just recently I’ve been delivering various training and group coaching sessions in confident presenting, confident leading, confident in personal relationships, confident selling and building self-confidence, in addition to my 121 work with clients. One thing I learned early on about delivering coaching and training sessions is the value of getting feedback.
In my early days of training I used to look at feedback sheets with a mixture of dread and excitement. I looked forward to the praise, especially if I felt it had gone really well.
But, part of me was worried that I had unwittlingly messed up and that someone would say something critical which would then play on my mind.
Then I began to realise that the feedback forms were designed to encourage people to give balanced, constructive and quality feedback. So, whatever the feedback was it would be useful – if it was praise then I would know I was on the right track and if it was critical then I’d know what to change to make it better next time. This gives me even more confidence for the future.
The trouble with most situations in life is that we can’t give out forms that encourage people to give balanced feedback.
So, here are some secrets I’ve learned to make sure I get quality feedback that has built my confidence with colleagues, clients, family and friends and the occasional difficult person.
Use these tips and they will help you build even more confidence in your life. In fact, you’ll never dread critical comments again! J
- Feedback Confidence Secret 1
I’m careful about who I take notice of – I only ask for feedback from people who are ‘qualified’. These are people who are willing to give balanced, constructive and quality feedback. That way I can feel confident about asking them.
- Feedback Confidence Secret 2
I ask those people curious questions so that it’s easier for them to give me balanced, constructive and quality feedback e.g. What do you like about….? What would make it even better? What makes you think that…?
- Feedback Confidence Secret 3
If they haven’t waited to be asked and have just fired off some critical comments, I ask those questions in tip 2.
- Feedback Confidence Secret 4
I give balanced, constructive and quality feedback so that I can be a good role model for people around me of how I would like to be treated.
They say feedback is the breakfast of champions. Getting quality feedback has definitely helped me go from strength to strength.
I’d love to know how you get on with these tips.
Have fun!
Warm wishes
Madeleine
P.S. You can download more valuable confidence tips at www.buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
P.P.S. If you'd like to find out more about how to fast track your journey to natural confidence, please email Madeleine at mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk to book a free discovery session. We explore where you are with your confidence, where you'd like to be and what resources are available to bridge the gap.
Madeleine Morgan is a qualified Life Coach and NLP Master Practitioner based in Cambridge CB4 1LN UK
Confident Career Building Coaching Programme
The Secrets to having Confidence at Work Revealed:
There are many reasons why even the most talented professionals, managers, business owners and consultants lose confidence at work, such as:
- a difficult relationship with their boss, client or team member,
- being in the wrong role
- outgrowing your earlier career choices
- lack of knowledge about what to choose and how to make a career change
- trying to juggle career/business and home,
- lack of self-esteem
- unreasonable deadlines
- lack of reward and recognition
- economic recession
- difficult economic climate
- lack of the right kind of support, coaching and training
The list is endless…
Why is it Important to Feel Confident at Work?
Because the more confident you are at work the more likely you are to get rewarded in every way. You have more chance of:
ü Earning a higher salary/profits
ü Gaining a promotion
ü Achieving impressive results
ü Choosing the right career path for you
ü Getting the recognition and respect you deserve
ü Having fun while you earn
ü Trying new and exciting things
ü Feeling part of a great team
ü Learning and growing
ü Making a positive difference
How to Make a Confident Career Change
Your work takes up a huge chunk of your life. What’s more, you’ll never get that time back. So, don’t you owe it to yourself to do something you’re happy with and excited about, something that’s really rewarding?
It would be a shame if you missed out when you could be one of the 20% doing a job they love and getting well paid for it too.
Whether you want to return to work after a career break or take stock after being made redundant or you can see it’s time for a change, I can help you save time and make it easier for you to:
ü get clarity, focus and direction
ü take the steps that find the right job/career for you
ü discover the 4 key elements YOU need in a job you’ll enjoy
ü play to your strengths, so you can be more successful and fulfilled
ü decide whether to stay in a job or start a business
ü choose the right time to move on
ü confidently handle challenges such as restructuring, redundancy, retirement
ü maximise your earning potential
ü increase your promotion potential
The Secrets to Being Confident and Richly Rewarded at Work
I’ve made it my job to discover the secrets of the people who have confidence at work and who are richly rewarded on all levels. These are just some of the ways I can help you develop your career confidence, build your self-esteem at work and earn more:
ü recession-proof your career or business
ü feel prepared and confident for a job interview or appraisal
ü learn the secrets that help you get the recognition you deserve
ü grow your confidence and skills so that your problems seem small
ü confidently handle challenges such as restructuring, getting a new boss and promotion
ü have employers and clients ringing you instead of you having to search for a job
ü create more successful working relationships with clients and colleagues
ü put right a situation that’s gone wrong
ü learn to read people and situations like a book
ü deal easily with difficult colleagues and clients
ü develop your selling, negotiating and influencing skills
ü cross the minefield of office politics and competitive environments safely
ü be the manager they remember for all the right reasons
ü manage your manager
ü take the stress out of balancing home and work
ü discover the secrets of effective time management
ü Give up procrastination and get motivated
How to Get Your Hands on These Life Changing Strategies
If you want to read more, sign up for your free report worth £9.99: 7 Secrets to Feeling Naturally Confident and the monthly tips.
| ‘I left my job feeling my career was going nowhere. Madeleine has helped me to take back control. First we clarified what I really wanted to do and then we worked on strategies to build confidence, unlock my creativity and develop leadership and communication skills. Now I've got a great new job and I honestly believe I wouldn't have done it half as well without my life coach.’Joan Herbert, Business Development Manager, Cambridge |
If you’re fed up with procrastinating and you’re ready to take a step in an even more life changing direction, email Madeleine at mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk or phone me on 01223 426392, fto book a free discovery coaching session where
During your Free Confidential Discovery Session:
- You’ll get crystal clear about what you want.
- We’ll uncover any hidden obstacles that may be sabotaging your personal and career success.
- I’ll help you get reinspired, energised and motivated about rebuilding your career confidence.
- And I’ll explain the resources and programmes available to help you build your confidence, career, and wealth.
Contact Madeleine now to book your free session - the sooner we talk, the sooner you’ll start enjoying the benefits.
mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk or phone 01223 426392
.
| ‘I just thought you’d like to know the RAF decided to offer me a place as a pilot. Thank you for your help with my interview technique. I don’t think I would have been able to successfully get through without the advice you gave me.’Matt Wathen |
| ‘When I phoned up Madeleine, I never expected the coaching she gave me to impact on my professional life as well as my personal life. As a teacher, I’ve used the strategies she taught me with colleagues and students to create win-win situations. They’ve enabled me to diffuse and even prevent confrontation and make the learning environment an even more pleasant and successful place to be. I have learned how to successfully deal with stressful situations and I’ve become a better manager of people.’Polly Redmond, Teacher |
Confidence Coaching Breakthrough Sessions
Confidence Building Sessions for Professionals, Managers and Business Owners
½ day Discovery Session
We’ll find out life-changing answers to these key questions:
- What are your strengths?
- Where are you now? Where do you want to be?
- What are the hidden forces holding you back from getting what you want in life?
- What’s your individual blue print for success?
You’ll go away with:
- A map for how you think and how that influences your behaviour and the results you get in positive and negative ways
- A personality profile showing you:
- your personal, work and leadership strengths,
- what holds you back in those areas how others see you –
- what motivates you in work
- An inventory of your top skills
- A map for increasing your confidence on 7 levels
We’ll use all this information to help you get rid of the road blocks in your way, improve your work and personal relationships and development your career/business plan and strengthen your confidence.
Investment: £597
For more information, email madeleine at mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
or call 01223 426392
½ Day Breakthrough Session
This is where:
- We clear your mental and emotional decks and take out the rubbish, the:
- difficult things that have happened to you in the past,
- negative things you say to yourself
- negative influence of others
- bad habits such as procrastination
- negative feelings like fear, anger, guilt, sadness and hurt
- I’ll show you little-known short cuts to creating natural confidence.
Then you can dump the gremlins of the past and enjoy the present and the future
Investment: £697
For more information, email madeleine at mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
or call 01223 426392
½ Day Strategy Session-
We put together action plans to create the wealth, work and personal life you really want.
- Get a clear idea of the big and small things you want to achieve in your relationships, career, business, health, wealth, fun and contribution in life.
- Prioritise your goals
- Create a motivating personal and career/business development plan to achieve them
Investment: £597
For more information, email madeleine at mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
or call 01223 426392
Confidence Building VIP Coaching and Training Programme
“Managers, Professionals and Business Owners…
Are You Frustrated by Your Lack of Confidence?
Then this VIP ‘360 Days to Total Confidence Programme’ is for You”
93% of people lack confidence in some area of their life, at some point in their life.
Many high achievers have told me they secretly fear that someday people are going to find out they’re not that talented.
Often confidence deserts you when you need it most – when it’s time to get out of your comfort zone and make your next leap.
“Are more confident people than you enjoying better relationships, more influence, bigger opportunities, more money and more fun?”
Do you want to stop feeling…
- You’re stuck because the next step might be a mistake
- You’re holding yourself back from more personal, career and financial success
- Your people skills socially, in meetings and presentations let you down
- the business world is robbing your fulfilment, individuality and freedom
- dealing with difficult personal and work relationships is stealing your time and energy
- you’re succeeding at work but losing in life – you have no time to have fun and your personal relationships are suffering
- you’ve tried making changes but you fall back into old negative habits
- you’re in an uncomfortable comfort zone
- you’re surrounded by negative or critical people
- you’ve lost your sense of direction and life seems to be driving you
- You’re battling with the recession and you might lose
- More confident people than you are enjoying better relationships ,more influence, bigger opportunities, more money and more fun
By Now, You’re Probably Wondering What Keeps You in the
Low-Confidence Trap?
You can’t logic yourself out of a lack of confidence
Have you notice how low-confidence seems so illogical? It doesn’t matter how often you tell yourself not to worry, ‘I’ve prepared’, ‘I’ve done this before and so it will be okay’, ‘What’s the worst thing that can happen – I won’t die if it goes wrong!’ ‘They can only say, No’.
The doubtful, exhausting, irritating voice inside your head asks, “What if it goes wrong?” “What if I make a mistake?” “What will they think of me?” “What if I haven’t prepared enough?” “What if I say the wrong thing?”
Then when you give in to feeling nervous and stressed you don’t say what you think and you miss the opportunity to act. Afterwards you feel frustrated and stupid for feeling nervous, especially when someone else has grabbed the rewards for acting more courageously – they’ve got the partner, the promotion, the credibility, the experience, the wealth.
You wonder, “Why can’t I do a simple thing like manage my nerves?”
Why does that happen over and over again? Because…
It’s difficult to feel more confident when you haven’t been shown HOW.
You were taught how to manage your emotions by parents, teachers and others who didn’t have a clue how to do that properly. Nor did their parents and teachers…
Also,
Things which really hold us back are invisible to us.
Or rather, they leave clues that we need to learn to read before we can overcome them. For instance stress is often really a lack of confidence.
You might be wondering whether it’s possible to change if you’ve been the same way most of your life.
Read on to hear about my personal experience…
“So, How Can You Escape the Low-Confidence Trap?”
These days I run a successful business doing what I love, I feel confident taking on new challenges and speaking in public. I enjoy my relationships with my husband, family and friends.
But it wasn’t always that way. There was a time in my life when I was stuck in a relationship rut and I didn’t have the courage to change it. I was in a job where my senior manager was holding me back but I didn’t challenge him. I was underpaid for what I contributed but I didn’t have the confidence to ask for more. I was shy with new people and easily intimidated by more assertive and aggressive ones. Sometimes I would hide my lack of confidence by being aloof, angry or defensive.
Then I discovered personal development books and audio programmes. I started to do more adventurous things. I went to work abroad, learned to SCUBA dive (and teach others to dive too, in my spare time), made new friends from all over the world and met my husband.
The only trouble was, I did all those things and still lacked confidence. I felt the fear and did those things anyway. My life had got more interesting but the anxiety was still there.
Then I tried those intensive 3-7 day workshops where highly motivational speakers took 100s or 1000s of people on emotional roller coaster journeys of self discovery. I definitely experienced some break-throughs and had great fun. But I came down to earth with a bump once I got back to my own life and the supportive and energised atmosphere had gone.
I wondered, ‘How can I get out of the low-confidence trap once and for all?’
I’ve been on a long quest to discover the real secrets of natural confidence. I’ve easily invested more than £67K in the last 15 years to learn and experience more and more of these personal, business and professional development tools that I’ve used to help me make big changes in my life and the lives of my 893 clients.
I’ve been thinking…
Many clients expect coaching programmes to be 6-12 sessions long. But the clients who experience greater benefits stay longer. There’s a limit to what I can help you achieve in just 6-12 hours especially in these difficult times.
You tend to fall back into old, stressful ways of coping when there’s lots of bad news, people are feeling worried, you’re fighting fires at work and family life is very demanding.
These days many successful coaches are reducing the time they spend on labour intensive 1-2-1 coaching and running group coaching instead. My business coach has been telling me to go that way too. But I know 1-2-1 is a better way for my clients.
I want to offer a programme for professionals, managers and business owners, like you, who really want to stop short-changing yourself, get out of the ‘low-confidence’ trap and achieve your potential… and are willing to invest in yourself to do it.
Then I asked myself, ‘What would be a complete package that would help you create your best years forever?’
“What Would Your Life Look, Sound and Feel Like if You Knew How to Create Your Best Years…Forever?”
What if you could:
- Feel comfortable in your own skin
- Love, lead and live courageously
- Enjoy career and business success on your own terms
- Create the solutions others wish they’d thought of
- Deal with difficult work and personal challenges confidently and skilfully
- Get the financial rewards and recognition you deserve
- Wake up feeling full of energy and vitality?
“With the Recession it has never been more important to give yourself the emotional, mental and skill advantage that this coaching programme can give you.”
In these challenging times you need something special.
Here’s what I came up with…
The 360 Days to Total Confidence Programme
½ day Discovery Session – worth £597
We’ll find out life-changing answers to these key questions:
- What are your strengths?
- Where are you now? Where do you want to be?
- What are the hidden forces holding you back from getting what you want in life?
- What’s your individual blue print for success?
You’ll go away with:
- A map for how you think and how that influences your behaviour and the results you get in positive and negative ways
- A personality profile showing you:
- your personal, work and leadership strengths,
- what holds you back in those areas how others see you –
- what motivates you in work
- An inventory of your top skills
- A map for increasing your confidence on 7 levels
We’ll use all this information to help you get rid of the road blocks in your way, improve your work and personal relationships and development your career/business plan and strengthen your confidence.
½ Day Breakthrough Session – worth £697
This is where:
- We clear your mental and emotional decks and take out the rubbish, the:
- difficult things that have happened to you in the past,
- negative things you say to yourself
- negative influence of others
- bad habits such as procrastination
- negative feelings like fear, anger, guilt, sadness and hurt
- I’ll show you little-known short cuts to creating natural confidence.
Then you can dump the gremlins of the past and enjoy the present and the future
½ Day Strategy Session- worth £597
We put together action plans to create the wealth, work and personal life you really want.
- Get a clear idea of the big and small things you want to achieve in your relationships, career, business, health, wealth, fun and contribution in life.
- Prioritise your goals
- Create a motivating personal and career/business development plan to achieve them
12 Skill Building Sessions – worth £1197
Gain the Skills and Knowledge You Need to Get the Results You Want
Part of gaining confidence is about knowing what action to take in challenging situations. So, included in the programme are monthly webinars (or teleseminars) covering proven, effective and often little known tools and techniques to improve your key life skills. These practical skills will make your goals easier to achieve and you’ll be able to use them straightaway.
When you master these skills you master your life.
And …You become invaluable to your organisation, family and friends. These are the kind of skills that help you recession-proof your business or career.
Here are the skills and some of the tools and tips you’ll discover:
- Managing Your Self:
- Time management – how to get more done in less time, overcome procrastination, find out why hard work and positive thinking are not enough
- Decision making – how to make difficult decisions
- Presentation skills – discover how to communicate so others will listen, enhance your image and reputation, learn the secrets of the master public speakers
- Creative thinking – how to come up with ideas others wish they had thought of, discover how to be smarter than you think
- Wealth Mastery – discover why you’re not rich, gain the mindset that leads to wealth, discover key wealth creating strategies
- Health Mastery – how to strengthen your immune system, tools for total well-being and vitality, have the body you want
Managing Your Relationships with Others:
- Joint problem solving tools – empower your team and your family to solve problems together, instead of avoiding them or arguing about them
- Understanding the opposite sex – discover what you need to know to get the best out of your work and personal relationships
- Influencing – how to win cooperation, win people over to your ideas, how to be respected as a leader in your family, community and at work even if you don’t have an official title
- Win-win negotiation skills – how to get the best deal every time
- Selling skills – how to sell your ideas, skills, services and products without appearing to be selling,
- Dealing with difficult conversations – discover how to handle people’s control games and negative comments, how to give difficult feedback and news that’s received well.
Then, I thought you need some elements designed to make the changes ‘stick’ so it becomes natural for you to feel and act confidently. These elements will provide the support, clarity and focus you need to keep taking action when life tries to pull you in different directions and draws you into fire fighting:
- 4 hours of emergency 1-2-1 coaching to use when needed – worth £597
For instance you can use it for intensive skills training or for a big challenge/project that’s coming up.
- 24 Momentum Sessions – worth £1797
- Fortnightly, 30-minute coaching sessions, face-to-face, over the phone or Skype, to help you avoid procrastinating and getting distracted.
You’ll stay Motivated, Focussed and on Target to create the future you really want.
We’ll complete a goal sheet for each session so that you know what you need to do in the coming fortnight.
- Ongoing email support – worth £698
This is for those times when you have a quick question you want to ask between sessions. Perhaps something unexpected has come up and you want some quick tips or encouraging words or honest helpful feedback.
- 12 CD recordings, one for each of the monthly webinars – worth £567
So that you can quickly gain mastery while you listen in your car or on your lap top at times that fit into your busy life.
- Daily motivational quotes delivered to your inbox via email with action points - worth £397
- 25% Discounts off my public workshops
That’s a total value is £6447
It’s worth even more when you think that the quality of your life is the quality of your emotions and of your relationships with your self and others.
Now, if that made you gulp, it was meant to. I’m looking for people who are serious about investing in their quality of life and who value high quality material.
What’s the Investment I’m Actually Asking of You?
I’m willing to reward you for you commitment, meet you part of the way and offer you the programme at:
- £4997
AND That's Not All...
You don't even have to pay all at once!
If you sign up today, you can also opt to pay for your Total Confidence Programme in easy monthly installments – when you promise to be totally committed to the process. You can choose:
- 6 x monthly installments of £897 or
- 10 x monthly installments of £547
N.B. This offer only lasts until the end of the month
Now, because I want to give you my quality time and energy there are only 24 places on the programme this coming year.
“This Programme isn’t for Everyone”
This Total Confidence Programme isn’t for everyone. To check if you’re ready, I’ve created an application questionnaire for you to complete. Just by completing it you’ll get some valuable insights. Together, we’ll look at your answers and decide if you want Total Confidence now or whether you postpone Total Confidence for some time in the future.
Email mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk to get a questionnaire sent to you. Or type your answers to the questions at the bottom of this page in a Word document and email them to: mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
It’s safe to apply because your questionnaire doesn’t commit you to joining the programme
“The Quality of Your Life is the Quality of Your Emotions and Your Relationships”
So do you want to continue to see people with more confidence than you enjoying better relationships, more influence, bigger opportunities, more money and more fun?
Or do YOU want to have the power to get rid of self-doubt, negativity and stress?
In this VIP Total Confidence Programme you are getting the power of £67,000 worth of research, 15 years of experience and 893 more confident clients to help you create all the personal, financial and career success you want.
Guarantee
When you promise to be committed, I am totally cpnfident I can make you confident with this programme. This is my passion and I take what I do and the results I get very seriously. So if you don’t get the confidence and skill you need to achieve your goals, then I will give you a full no questions asked refund. I wouldn't work any other way.
I’m looking forward to working with you
To your confidence
Warm wishes
Madeleine
P.S. Remember: If you sign up today, you can also opt to pay for your Total Confidence Programme in easy monthly installments
- 6 x monthly installments of £897 or
- 10 x monthly installments of £547
N.B. This offer only lasts until the end of the month
There are only 24 places on the programme this year.
Email mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk to get a questionnaire sent to you. Or type your answers to the questions at the bottom of this page in a Word document and email them to: mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
It’s safe to apply because your questionnaire doesn’t commit you to joining the programme.
P.P.S: Still unsure? Just take a quick look at what my clients say.
"Madeleine is an exceptional coach. Very quickly she expanded my thinking way beyond the limits I had set for myself and not only gave me practical step-by-step advice that moved me forward in my career, my business and my personal development. She also revealed to me the things I was doing in my head that were preventing me from enjoying the success I'd already achieved. In a very short time, and as a direct result of Madeleine's coaching
- My confidence soared
- I secured an interview for the job of my dreams
- I got really clear on a part-time business I wanted to build
On top of all this, the process, wisdom and expertise she brought to the coaching allowed me to make changes in myself that deepened my relationship with my girlfriend, improved my interpersonal skills with colleagues at work and most important of all, given me an ongoing realisation that this whole journey is exciting and enjoyable.”
Ben Green, Marketing Manager
'I wanted to leave my job as I felt my career was going nowhere. Madeleine helped me take back control. First we clarified what I really wanted to do. Then, we worked on strategies to build confidence, unlock my creativity and develop leadership and communication skills. Now I've got a great new job and I honestly believe I wouldn't have done it half so well without my Life Coach.'
Joan Herbert, PhD, Business Development Manager, Cambridge
“I’ve experienced so many benefits from Madeleine’s coaching. I now have more confidence and skill to run my business in ways that help me have more fun, more profit and more time. Rather than my business driving me, I feel more in control.
Some of the many results of our coaching sessions are that I’ve:
- Raised my prices and improved the way I market, sell and tender my services
- Discovered more about what’s important to me and how to take my business in a direction that will give me the lifestyle I want
- Developed ways of dealing with difficult people, work and personal situations that have stopped them being a drain on me
Time spent with Madeleine energises me for the rest of the week. The coaching sessions help me to deal with challenges more creatively and faster. So, I spend more time on what I really care about - my family, friends and clients.”
Diane Wright, Anglia Wright Advice, Health and Safety Consultancy
“I have enjoyed working with Madeleine – she has provided focus, ideas, structure and achievable action plans to help with my business progression.
Going from corporate life to running my own business was difficult. Helping me to overcome the obstacles blocking my thought processes, meant I achieved significant progress in a relatively short period of time, rather than procrastinating and getting bogged down with trivia.
Madeleine has provided a number of great ideas to enhance my business plan, drawing on her knowledge and experience. I have also learnt some valuable tips to enhance my business tool kit through the NLP techniques she uses.
One of the most powerful lessons learnt, is how to deal with difficult people – an invaluable seminar run by Madeleine. This was thought provoking, structured and fun!
Working with Madeleine will enhance your business and give you more confidence to deal with life!”
Aegean Thomson, Business Owner and Events Coordinator, Event Wishes
“Working with Madeleine has given me so much more than I could ever have imagined when I committed to the coaching process. She guides, mentors, encourages, motivates, teaches and inspires. She has shown me new ways to strengthen my marketing messages and come up with countless new ideas to develop my business. Looking at what I was doing through someone else’s eyes and with her creative expertise, has put a different spin and focus on where I expend my energies. I am reaping tremendous benefits. I have more clarity, focus and direction. Her ideas library knows no bounds. Madeleine imparts all this with great wisdom, coupled with humour; it’s an enjoyable process and quite addictive!”
Isobel Read, Business Owner
“Hi Madeleine,
Just wanted to say a big THANK YOU for sharing your sales conversation with me - I made my first sale today at £799!
Looking forward to our call tomorrow.”
Jane
Jane Bennett
P.P.P.S. Email mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk to get a questionnaire sent to you. Or type your answers to the questions at the bottom of this page in a Word document and email them to: mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
It’s safe to apply because your questionnaire doesn’t commit you to joining the programme
Total Confidence Programme Application Questionnaire
1. What’s your primary motivation in applying for this programme?
- Build my business
- Create more career success
- Enjoy more fulfiling personal relationships
- other
2. How much personal investment training have you invested in? Select one
- None
- I’ve read some books and listened to CDs
- I’ve been on a short workshop
- I’ve been on many courses
3. Can I count on you to be 100% present -- positive, attentive, with a can-do attitude and willingness to learn - if you are selected to attend?
4. YOUR PERSONAL VISION: Please use the space below to tell me how your life will change if you’re accepted on this programme: 200 words or less
- What are your financial goals for the next 5 years?
- What life style would you like?
- What are your personal goals?
- What will you achieve in your business or career?
- What treats (gadgets, holidays, experiences etc.) will you buy yourself?
- How will you give back to your family and community?
5. If there was only one place left on the Total Confidence Programme, why should you be chosen?
6. When you have reached your goals with Total Confidence, can I use your success story to inspire others? Yes/no
7. What is the best time to contact you by telephone?
Date:
Time:
* Please note, if we can't reach you within 24 hrs of trying to contact you, we will move onto the next prospective candidate. So, it's in your best interest to provide us with as much contact information as possible!
- First Name
- Surname
- Primary email address
- Mobile
- Postal address
How to Stop Procrastinating and Get Motivated
I went to a business networking meeting recently where a business advisor gave a talk on how to overcome procrastination and get things done. The audience enjoyed his entrepreneurial Just-Focus-and-Do-It spirit. I also like the phrase, 'Procrastinate later!'
If it's that simple, why do so many people procrastinate? Is it laziness? Is it that they don't know WHAT to do? Or are there other factors - mindset for instance?
If you look at people who enjoy a lot of personal, career and business success one thing they have in common is their determination to take action. Where others are waiting for the right time and the perfect action, the mindset of the people who get the most done tends to be, 'imperfect action beats perfect inaction every time'. Richard Branson is a great example of this - he wrote a book called, 'Screw it, Let's Do it!' A trait of successful people is that they are prepared to fail hard as well as succeed spectacularly.
It's action that brings the feedback that makes their next attempt more likely to succeed - if they are willing to learn useful things from their experience. A study of millionaires found that the average millionaire goes bankrupt three and a half times. Few people have the determination and tenacity to ride that roller coaster of failure and success. For the ones that do, it's their willingness to review what they did, measure their results, record the lessons learned and change what they are doing that helps them hone their success formula. Few people have been trained or brought up to have that objectivity and discipline. What most people learn after a 'failure' is something useless - don't try again.
A short cut to success is to get a personal, career or business coach to advise, mentor and train you. Someone who has the skills, experience and knowledge to help you reach your goals, the supportive objectivity to help you stand back and assess and who will help you stay motivated to take the next steps. A coach can help you sort out the 20% of action you need to take that will get you 80% of your results. One entrepreneur said, 'Life is too short for me to learn everything I need to know from my mistakes. That's why I have a coach.'
Many people give up when just one more try would bring them the results they are looking for. For instance, research shows that it often takes three to seven times before people are convinced that an idea will work or that a product or service is worth buying, yet many sales people, professionals, managaers, life partners, parents and friends lose the sale or opportunity to influence because they give up after the first or second try. Even fewer people have the confidence to withstand the doubts and criticism of those around them and their own even louder inner critic, when it goes wrong.
This is where a life, career or business coach can help too. They help you take a step back and assess things objectively and help you remain courageous and motivated to keep going. They also have the skill to help you develop more ways to get what you want and the mindset to achieve it. For instancce, you can make more sales, convince people of your point of view and achieve your outcomes more often if you know more ways to communicate with different kinds of people and develop a flexible approach. A life, career or business coach can also help you silence your inner critic - especially an NLP trained coach - and get quality information from your intuition. This is where a life, career or business coach can give you more than someone who just tells you what to do.
Richard Branson and many other people we would consider successful also choose a good team to help them do the things they are not good at or interested in doing. To do that, you first need to know what you are good at. That is where a personality profile can give you shortcuts to the awareness you need. My clients find that the valuable and insightful feedback they get from the FACET5 personality profiling system I use accelerates their personal, career and business success. They get a clear understanding of their strengths and areas for development. They get great clues as to why they procrastinate and what they need to do to take action. One client realised why he procrastinated over people oriented tasks such as networking, presenting his business, meeting new friends and women and dealing with difficult team members. Another discovered why she was putting the wrong sized tasks on her 'To Do' lists. They also realised what kind of people they needed to have around them in their business and personal lives to succeed and experience the rewards they were looking for.
So some keys to getting your 'To Do' lists done are: find out WHAT to do, write lists, find the 20% of tasks that give you the 80% of your results and do them first, delegate to the right people, find out what your strengths are and play to them, measure your results, be flexible about how to achieve your goals, get a life, career or business coach to help you take shortcuts to success and learn positive and useful things from your experience.
I wish you every success in your personal, career and business life, Madeleine
www.growu.co.uk - download more success tips
www.buildingselfconfidence.co.uk - download more confidence tips
Madeleine Morgan runs inspiring, motivating, thought provoking, practical and effective private and public career and business coaching and training programmes in Cambridge and in-house programmes in the UK. She coaches over the telephone, Skype and face-to-face.
How to Gain More Confidence – Who do you turn to for help?
Every one of us feels a lack of confidence at some point in our lives. For some of us it's in a particular area such as public speaking, selling ourselves in business or at a job interview, standing up to aggressive people, asking someone for a date. For some it seems to affect every area of their lives. Before I learned how to be more confident and then became a confidence coach I used to find meeting new people really difficult - I often found myself stuck for what to say.
With all the helping professionals, advice from friends and family and self-help books out there it can be confusing to know who or what to turn to for the most effective help. So here are some ideas to get you started.
Excellent self-help books such as 'I Can Make You Confident' by Paul McKenna are useful for tips and for supporting you when you need a quick burst of inspiration. The limitation of books, CDs etc is that they have to be general and can't deal with your specific limiting beliefs and experience. Some people find that the tips take time, discipline and persistence to implement and that can be difficult to find when you are working on your own, especially if you are surrounded by difficult people who try to undermine you.
One way to deal with the people round you is to make sure that, where you have a choice, you mix with people who are encouraging, supportive and who give you quality feedback. I have some tips on training people to give you quality feedback which I will mention in a future blog entry. Friends, family and colleagues can be encouraging and helpful and these are definitely relationships to nurture. However, they can sometimes be too close to us to be objective. If you lack confidence it's easy to dismiss their encouragement as just 'being nice'. Their advice naturally come from what they would do in a situation which may not fit your personality and skill level. When you hear it you might find yourself saying, 'Yes, but...'
If you there are negative people in your life that, at least for the time being, are permanent fixtures then you may need some guidance as to how to get the best out of them. In fact a big part of gaining confidence is about discovering the skills you need to handle a certain situation such as how to sell effectively, deal with conflict, get the best out of your relationships, say 'No' gracefully and how to choose what you feel. Someone once said that all struggle is a sign of a need for more skill.
Then there are a whole raft of professionals - counsellors, coaches, therapists, NLP practitioners etc. The advantages of going to a good professional are that they are supportive and yet also objective. Your personal development can move faster than if you work on yourself alone. They can help you stay motivated to change, especially at times when you might want to give up. They can deal with you as an individual, with your specific concerns and needs. They can break things down into manageable bit sized chunks so that you get enough to move you on without it being overwhelming. So who do you choose?
All of these professional will have skills that can help you. So here are some things to consider when choosing.
Is this person supportive and yet also able to challenge me enough to move me out of my comfort zone and into the adventure zone?
Do they have the skills to help me clear past negative experiences that we all have and that are holding me back?
Do they have a lot of experience and success with clients with the areas of confidence I want to build?
Do they have recognised qualifications like being a NLP master practitioner accredited by the ABNLP and BBNLP?
Do they know skills that will help you use the confidence you gain effectively? It's no good having the confidence to jump in a plane and fly it if you haven't had flying lessons! So if you need confidence in business networking or meeting you new people, do they have the knowledge and skills to share with you? On the other hand do they have the ability to give you tips that suit your personality? Can they help you gain the confidence to use them (many general workshops and trainings work on skills but not limiting beliefs)
Do they give you a free consultation to help you find all this out and help you decide if you'd feel comfortable working together
Will they guarantee that if you get nothing useful, they will refund your money?
Check out www.buildingselfconfidence.co.uk as an example
I hope you've found this useful to help you get the most effective help
Have a confident day, Warm wishes from Madeleine Morgan
www.buildingselfconfidence.co.uk
Cambridge
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