Building Self Confidence Blog
25Jan/140

Are you Addicted to Stress? Confidence Tips #50

Last week we talked about the personal, business and career costs of stress.

But if it’s so costly, why is a stressful way of living and working so hard to change?

Well…whenever we habitually do or feel something we know it would be difficult but valuable to change, it’s because there’s some ‘benefit’ to staying the same that makes it addictive.

For instance, many smokers believe that smoking helps them relax even if, at the same time, they’re putting more physical stress on their bodies!

So what are some of the conscious and unconscious costly benefits from stress that some people experience? Here are 7 of them. Do you recognise any of them in yourself or others?

1.    Stress may help us appear important.    

After all, anyone as stressed as we are must be working very hard and so we’re probably doing something vital. While anyone who is relaxed is probably not stretching themselves enough.

2.    Stress could let us maintain personal distance and avoid intimacy.       

Anyone as busy as we are certainly can't be expected to spend quality time with friends, family, partners, clients and colleagues.

3.    Sometimes stress helps us avoid responsibilities and tasks.

Obviously we’re too stressed to be given any more work. But…what interesting projects and opportunities are we missing out on?

4.    Stress gives us an adrenalin rush.      

It’s possible to get addicted to your own adrenaline.

5.    Stress could help us avoid success.         

Yes, some people actually fear success and all they imagine might come with it. Stress can keep your achievement level low enough that success won't ever be a threat.

6.    Some people find stress ‘allows’ them to keep their authoritarian communication style.      

"Just do what I say!" mode is often seen as allowable under crisis conditions.  A permanent air of crisis can be used to justify a dictatorial style all the time. But…what happens to the quality of our working and personal relationships?

7.    Stress can be associated with success

If we’ve experienced a lot of stress on our journey to success, we believe that, somehow, stress was an important ingredient in our success formula. If we’re not worried, we’ve probably missed something.

So what can we do to break this addiction and go from stress to healthy success <First name>?

The short answer is to find more healthy and sustainable ways to achieve the benefits we get from stress.

If you’d like help with achieving that I’m offering a free From Stress to Success Discovery Session. I have only 2 slots available. We’ll discuss your stress levels in your business, career or personal life. We’ll uncover hidden barriers to eliminating stress. We’ll get clear on how you can manage or elimate your stress. You’ll go away feeling positive, excited and certain about your next steps. If you would like to apply for a session, just email me: madeleine@growu.co.uk

Madeleine Morgan Executive Coach and Leadership MentorWarm wishes

Madeleine

P.S. Check out the ‘Useful Links’ to life changing free ‘stuff’ and the ‘Quotation of the Week’ listed below.

Useful Links

Quote of the Week

Maureen Killoran “Stress is not what happens to us. It's our response TO what happens. And RESPONSE is something we can choose.”

18Jan/140

Is Stress Silently Stealing Your Success? Confidence Tips 49

We all need a little pressure to make life interesting and motivating, otherwise we’d probably get bored or under-perform, wouldn’t we?

For instance, we often need the pressure of a deadline to get something done.

I know I need the pressure of having only 2 minutes before I leave to go somewhere where looking professional would be a good idea, to get motivated to clean my shoes. :)

However, whereas pressure can be necessary to our success, what about stress…and what’s the difference between stress and pressure, anyway?

Stress is a negative emotional or physical reaction to having too much pressure.

If you’re feeling stressed you’re not alone…see the statistics below.

It doesn’t matter where that stress comes from… lack of confidence, money worries, relationship difficulties, unrealistic deadlines (the clue is in the dead part :)), lack of skill, work pressures, health issues and so on… it can be a success stealer for your personal life, your business and your career.

At the same time research has found that managing or eliminating stress can give you huge personal, career and business rewards.

These statements may sound over dramatic so here are some startling statistics from reputable sources such as the CIPD (Chartered Institute of Personnel Development), The Corporate Leadership Council and the CMI (Chartered Management Institute) to bring some reality to this:

 74.6% of workers suffer significant work-related stress

Here are just some ways in which you might find stress is stealing your success:

 21% of employees are thinking of quitting their job because of stress levels – that means…

If you’re running a stressful business, your staff members who can’t find other opportunities stick around in a disinterested and disengaged way. The staff members whose skills are highly marketable go elsewhere and your business loses talented people who are vital to your profitability.

If you have a career you might make hasty choices to leave that stressful work situation that cause you to jump from the frying pan and into fire. When you leave because you can’t cope that tends to damage your self-esteem.

If your family is also bearing the brunt of your work stress, or stress at home is affecting your work, then you don’t feel successful in any area of your life!

40% of employers have recorded a rise in stress-related absence – that means lower productivity.

Lower productivity makes it difficult for managers to succeed because the business becomes less profitable.

It puts more stress on the people who are still coming into work…which creates a vicious circle of stress.

Businesses run the risk of being taken to court.

It’s harder to attract new talent.

45% of managers experience exhaustion and insomnia and the NHS is recording significantly higher admissions for stress-related conditions – ill health dramatically reduces our quality of life and can prevent us being as resourceful, creative and as happy as when we’re feeling fit and full of vitality. We make more mistakes when we’re not feeling well.

These common reactions to stress, create a vicious circle of stress:

  • Becoming addicted to stress – I’ll talk more about that next week
  • Working harder, rather than smarter
  • Becoming argumentative, complaining and blaming
  • Neglecting your health

So what are the rewards of managing or eliminating stress?

  • Research shows that businesses with employees who feel engaged, motivated  and who experience a healthy level of pressure:
  1. Grow profits 3 times faster than companies with highly stressed employees.
  2. Have low average employee absentee rates of 2.7 days per year compared to stressed employees who average 6.2 days
  3. Reduce staff turnover by 87%
  • If you’re a manager or other employee in a low stress company you can experience more financial and personal success and a more enjoyable work/life balance. So, choose your employer wisely.
  • If you manage your own stress skilfully, even in a difficult environment, your levels of personal, career and business success are more in your control.

So What Can You Do to Reduce Your Stress and Increase Your Success?

  • If you are a manager or owner manager who would like to increase your business success by reducing the stress in your company, I’m running a half-day workshop on Getting to Grips with Stress Management on Friday 24th January in Cambridge. Click here for more details. There are only 6 places.
    • If you’d prefer a 1-2-1 approach, I’m offering a free From Stress to Success Discovery Session. I have only 4 slots available. We’ll discuss your stress levels in your business, career or personal life. We’ll uncover hidden barriers to eliminating stress. We’ll get clear on how you can manage or eliminate your stress. You’ll go away feeling positive, excited and certain about your next steps.

If you would like to apply for a session, just email me: madeleine@growu.co.uk

Madeleine Morgan Executive Coach and Leadership MentorWarm wishes

Madeleine

P.S. Check out the ‘Useful Links’ to life changing free ‘stuff’ and ‘Special Events’ listed below.

Useful Links

Special Events:

1.    1-2-1 Complimentary Coaching Discovery Session

If you could change one thing in your personal, career or business life, what would it be? I have 3 complimentary spaces for 1-2-1 Discovery Sessions this month. During that session, we’ll discuss where you are in your business, career or personal life. We’ll uncover hidden barriers to your success. We’ll get clear on how you’d like your life to be. Then I’ll show you how you can bridge that gap. You’ll go away feeling positive, excited and certain about your next steps.

If you would like to apply for a session, just email me: madeleine@growu.co.uk

Quote of the Week

If you were able to look back at your most brilliant successes in 2014 now, how excited would you be about this year?

11Jan/140

How could you be extraordinary in 2014? Confidence Tips #48

An ordinary excuse I often hear people give for not getting something done, or not achieving their goals, is ‘I didn’t have time.’

It’s an excuse that trips easily off the tongue, blinds us to the truth and hypnotises us out of leading an extraordinary life.

That may sound a bit harsh but consider this.

Why do some people achieve an extraordinary amount while others seem to be spinning round in circles of procrastination and inefficiency, even though we all have the same 24 hours in a day?

Curiouser and curiouser!

Could we get closer to the truth if we say, ‘I didn’t make time’?

If that’s the case, it begs the question, ‘Why didn’t I make time?’

There could be all kinds of reasons. You could have perfectly sound explanations that are important to acknowledge because recognising them sets you free from unhealthy guilt like:

  • That task is not important anymore or should have a low priority
  • That goal is not relevant to me any more

Or you could have excuses for not achieving things. Those excuses deserve further exploration because they are blocking your personal, career and business success, such as:

  • Fear of failure
  • Fear of success
  • Lack of skill
  • Lack of self-belief
  • Saying yes to other people’s priorities
  • Saying ‘yes’ when you should have said ‘no’ to putting the task or goal on your to do list in the first place
  • Not understanding why the goal or task is important
  • Lack of SMART goals and priorities
  • Giving too much time to ‘time stealers’ - people and activities that you allow to suck the life out of you
  • Being reactive rather than planning and sticking to a strategy

Perhaps you’ve got some other excuses to add to the list? If you spend time dealing with these excuses you’ll find you have more time, more fulfilment and more success! More time to create and lead an extraordinary life.

And if you’re already good at achieving, you might enjoy going to the next level by reading the books I’ve suggested below.

Madeleine Morgan Executive Coach and Leadership MentorWarm wishes

Madeleine

P.S. Check out the ‘Useful Links’ to life changing free ‘stuff’ and ‘Special Events’ listed below.

Useful Links

Special Events:

Friday 10th January 7.30 – 9.30 How to Create a Successful Mindset

I’m giving a 30 minute talk at the Very Early Lunch Club business networking event.

For more details click here.

Recommended Reading:

  • The One Minute Manager by Ken Blanchard
  • The 4-Hour Work Week by Tim Ferris
  • Eat that Frog by Brian Tracy
4Jan/140

10 Top Tips for Making Your New Year Resolutions a Success: Confidence Tips #47

We all need a little pressure to make life interesting and motivating, otherwise we’d probably get bored or under-perform, wouldn’t we?

For instance, we often need the pressure of a deadline to get something done.

I know I need the pressure of having only 2 minutes before I leave to go somewhere where looking professional would be a good idea, to get motivated to clean my shoes. :)

However, whereas pressure can be necessary to our success, what about stress…and what’s the difference between stress and pressure, anyway?

Stress is a negative emotional or physical reaction to having too much pressure.

If you’re feeling stressed you’re not alone…see the statistics below.

It doesn’t matter where that stress comes from… lack of confidence, money worries, relationship difficulties, unrealistic deadlines (the clue is in the dead part :)), lack of skill, work pressures, health issues and so on… it can be a success stealer for your personal life, your business and your career.

At the same time research has found that managing or eliminating stress can give you huge personal, career and business rewards.

These statements may sound over dramatic so here are some startling statistics from reputable sources such as the CIPD (Chartered Institute of Personnel Development), The Corporate Leadership Council and the CMI (Chartered Management Institute) to bring some reality to this:

 74.6% of workers suffer significant work-related stress

Here are just some ways in which you might find stress is stealing your success:

 21% of employees are thinking of quitting their job because of stress levels – that means…

If you’re running a stressful business, your staff members who can’t find other opportunities stick around in a disinterested and disengaged way. The staff members whose skills are highly marketable go elsewhere and your business loses talented people who are vital to your profitability.

If you have a career you might make hasty choices to leave that stressful work situation that cause you to jump from the frying pan and into fire. When you leave because you can’t cope that tends to damage your self-esteem.

If your family is also bearing the brunt of your work stress, or stress at home is affecting your work, then you don’t feel successful in any area of your life!

40% of employers have recorded a rise in stress-related absence – that means lower productivity.

Lower productivity makes it difficult for managers to succeed because the business becomes less profitable.

It puts more stress on the people who are still coming into work…which creates a vicious circle of stress.

Businesses run the risk of being taken to court.

It’s harder to attract new talent.

45% of managers experience exhaustion and insomnia and the NHS is recording significantly higher admissions for stress-related conditions – ill health dramatically reduces our quality of life and can prevent us being as resourceful, creative and as happy as when we’re feeling fit and full of vitality. We make more mistakes when we’re not feeling well.

These common reactions to stress, create a vicious circle of stress:

  • Becoming addicted to stress – I’ll talk more about that next week
  • Working harder, rather than smarter
  • Becoming argumentative, complaining and blaming
  • Neglecting your health

So what are the rewards of managing or eliminating stress?

  • Research shows that businesses with employees who feel engaged, motivated  and who experience a healthy level of pressure:
  1. Grow profits 3 times faster than companies with highly stressed employees.
  2. Have low average employee absentee rates of 2.7 days per year compared to stressed employees who average 6.2 days
  3. Reduce staff turnover by 87%
  • If you’re a manager or other employee in a low stress company you can experience more financial and personal success and a more enjoyable work/life balance. So, choose your employer wisely.
  • If you manage your own stress skilfully, even in a difficult environment, your levels of personal, career and business success are more in your control.

So What Can You Do to Reduce Your Stress and Increase Your Success?

  • If you are a manager or owner manager who would like to increase your business success by reducing the stress in your company, I’m running a half-day workshop on Getting to Grips with Stress Management on Friday 24th January in Cambridge. Click here for more details. There are only 6 places.
    • If you’d prefer a 1-2-1 approach, I’m offering a free From Stress to Success Discovery Session. I have only 4 slots available. We’ll discuss your stress levels in your business, career or personal life. We’ll uncover hidden barriers to eliminating stress. We’ll get clear on how you can manage or eliminate your stress. You’ll go away feeling positive, excited and certain about your next steps.

If you would like to apply for a session, just email me: madeleine@growu.co.uk

Madeleine Morgan Executive Coach and Leadership MentorWarm wishes

Madeleine

P.S. Check out the ‘Useful Links’ to life changing free ‘stuff’ and ‘Special Events’ listed below.

Useful Links

Special Events:

1.    1-2-1 Complimentary Coaching Discovery Session

If you could change one thing in your personal, career or business life, what would it be? I have 3 complimentary spaces for 1-2-1 Discovery Sessions this month. During that session, we’ll discuss where you are in your business, career or personal life. We’ll uncover hidden barriers to your success. We’ll get clear on how you’d like your life to be. Then I’ll show you how you can bridge that gap. You’ll go away feeling positive, excited and certain about your next steps.

If you would like to apply for a session, just email me: madeleine@growu.co.uk

Quote of the Week

If you were able to look back at your most brilliant successes in 2014 now, how excited would you be about this year?

   
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