Building Self Confidence Blog
26Oct/100

How to Deal with Difficult People

Is Dealing with Difficult People Stealing Your Time and Energy and Even Your Wealth?

 

Then this “Dealing with Difficult People Made Easier” workshop is designed for you

 

Discover how to stop these people holding back your business, professional or personal life.

Take away tools and strategies that will help you:

  • get the best out of your team and your colleagues
  • improve client relationships,
  • make selling easier
  • make your personal life a joy
  • and your career or business more rewarding

 

Among many other things you’ll discover how to:

  • § Recognise classic types of difficult people and strategies for handling them
  • § Resolve conflict and create win-win outcomes
  • § Prepare for challenging situations and avoid escalating them further
  • § Develop rapport quickly and easily
  • § Deliver difficult feedback confidently and skilfully
  • § Read special clues in the body language, voice tones and words people use
  • § Learn assertive skills and behaviours – avoid aggressive or passive ones

 

100% Money Back Guarantee 

If by the end of the work you feel your knowledge about how to deal with difficult people has not improved, I will refund your money in full. All I ask is that you return the workshop materials.

 

Where’s the venue?

St John’s Innovation Centre – Milton Road, Cambridge

What time and date?

9 a.m. – 12.30 p.m. or 1.30 – 5.00pm on Wednesday 24th November  

So what is your investment to attend?

Because I feel strongly about sharing the tools to create win-win relationships, you can secure your seat for just £147 + VAT

Early bird price of £117 + VAT, if you book before Wednesday 15th November.

You can bring an additional team member from your business (or a guest who is not on my mailing list – perhaps that difficult person :-)) for £97 + VAT per person.

Places are limited to 4 per session so hurry and book yours!

 

How do I book?

Call Madeleine Morgan on 01223 426392 or email madeleine@growu.co.uk to confirm your booking or find out more.

 

“Thanks for making it so useful, informative and lively.” Vicky Faupel, Cambridge Network

“Madeleine is an exceptional coach and trainer.

Over the years, I have received coaching from some of the biggest names in business and personal development. In my estimation she is up there with the big boys.”

Ben Green, Marketing Manager

“I found the workshop very interesting and motivational. I’ve got more tools to create something better than compromise or win-lose situations. I can create win-win outcomes.”

Justine Fairweather, Credit Controller, UK Fixings

 

26Oct/100

Confident Presenting – 7 Tips to Raise Your Confidence When You’re Speaking in Public

One of the Most Elusive Keys to  Confident Presenting is Managing Yourself and Your Emotions

Most people experience lack of confidence when they are presenting as an emotional hijack they have no control over. Once the nerves start your body is taken over by your anxious and shallow breathing and racing heart beat. Butterflies begin their crazy flight in your stomach and the tension in your neck spreads down into your shoulders and travels down to your toes.  Sometimes the nerves start when you first find out you have a presentation coming up.  Then you have sleepless nights and anxious thoughts chase around in your brain - What if I forget what I've prepared? What if there's a glitch with the technology? What if people ask me awkward questions? What if... the list is endless. For some people the anxiety starts nearer the presentation - while you're waiting your turn, when you step on stage, while you're being introduced....Whenever the anxiety starts, the even worse thought is that if you lack confidence on stage all your worst fears are more likely to come about - you feel doomed because you absolutely know you'll fluff your lines, forget the most impressive point, stutter over the perceptive question and and everyone will see you're clutching your notes with a nervous grip. You know you'll also sentence yourself to endless replays of the worst moments and the things you should have said will haunt your brain.

No wonder research has found that most people fear public speaking more than death. Why is that? My guess is that we've been brought up to fear making a mistake in front of lots of people. For example, think of the ridicule heaped on kids at school by their fellow students and sometimes even their teachers for making small mistakes and giving 'wrong' answers.

The trouble is that a lot of the things we want most in life - career and business success, making a difference in the world, influencing others with our ideas, being known as an expert, making sales, championing a worthy cause, teaching so people learn, entertaining an audience and connecting with people in our work and personal lives depends on our ability to present confidently and  naturally. You have probably noticed that when you are feeling successful, motivated, happy and confident you are more likely to do the right things to get you what you want.

 Useful States for Presenters

It would be useful for you to be and feel confident, motivated, excited, enthusiastic, competent, assertive, powerful and many other positive states when presenting, wouldn't it?  Master presenters are able to create these emotions in themselves whenever they need them. And when they do that, they often lead their audiences to feel that way too.

Managing Your State

So how can you manage your emotions when you are preparing for and delivering a presentation? If you are feeling nervous or uncertain about a presentation, it is just a signal that you need to do more preparation on one or more of 7 levels. Here are some suggestions for causes of uncertainty at each level and ways in which you could prepare so that you feel confident:

 

1. Purpose/Goal/outcome: If you are uncertain at this level, it is possible that your purpose in giving the presentation is more to do with enhancing your reputation and seeking perfection.

 You have probably noticed that when you are focussed on contributing and giving a gift you are often able to forget yourself and focus on the needs of others instead and then perform better. So, a way to regain your confidence on this level is by focussing on giving the gift of your expertise, valuable information, encouragement, feedback and other things you think that you can contribute. The great thing is that when you do this you are more likely to enhance your reputation and achieve excellence anyway! 

2. How you think of yourself: If you are uncertain at this level it is possible that you do not think of yourself as a presenter or a valuable contributor. To regain confidence at this level, you could start to think of yourself as a presenter, learner, leader, contributor, catalyst for change and any other identity you think would be useful. Find evidence in your life to support these ways of thinking of yourself.

3. Values: Values are about what is important to you. If you are feeling uncertain at this level, it is possible that you value certainty, your significance and perfection above contribution, adventure, learning and growth and connection. You may be asking yourself lots of questions that create doubt in you, like: ‘What will they think of me?’ What if it goes wrong?’ What if someone asks me a question I can’t answer?’

 To regain confidence at this level you could ask yourself questions that put you in a resourceful state and relate to the values of contribution, learning and connection, such as: ‘How can I ensure that the presentation is effective and engaging for my audience?’ ‘What questions are they likely to ask and what answers shall I prepare?’

 4. Beliefs: Beliefs are about what we think is true. There is enough evidence in the world to believe anything we want to believe and so we might as well hold beliefs that support us.

If you are experiencing uncertainty at this level, these might be some of the beliefs that you hold: if I make a mistake people will think badly of me forever; it is bad to make mistakes; something will go wrong and I will look foolish; I am not a good presenter; they will find out that I am not as good as they thought; they know more than I do; my contribution is not worthwhile; if I feel confident people will think I’m arrogant or I won’t prepare properly etc.

 To regain confidence on this level you could believe: there is no failure only feedback; everyone makes a worthwhile contribution in their way; mistakes are just an opportunity to learn and grow; whatever happens I will handle it, etc. Find evidence to make the old negative beliefs look ridiculous and to strengthen the new and positive beliefs.

 5. Skills: Uncertainty at this level is about not knowing how to do something that would allow you to create a successful presentation. For instance, you might not be certain about how to stand and deliver, how to work a projector, how to create a Power Point presentation or how to keep your audience engaged in what you're saying.

To regain certainty at this level, identify the skills you need to develop and then seek training, feedback and practise. Find role models for the presentation styles you like and copy them.

 6. Behaviour: Uncertainty at this level is created if you are not doing the things you need to do to create a successful presentation.

To gain confidence at this level you need to plan and practise so that you use all the relevant skills well and unconsciously, just like you do when you are driving a car.

Bonus Tips:

In our neurology, our states and emotions are wired to our body language. So, one of the most important things to do at this level is to stand and move with a body language that helps you to experience the state you want. For instance, if you want to feel confident, stand taller, relax your shoulders, breath deeply and move more deliberately.

 7. Resources and Environment: Uncertainty at this level is about not having the time, equipment, assistance, space, etc. that you need to make your presentation successful.

To restore confidence at this level you need to make sure that you gather the resources and create the environment you need or work out ways to get round any challenges in this area. One useful resource is  a coach who can help you develop your confidence and the skills to present impactfully.

If you would like to find out more about how to present confidently, naturally and skilfully contact Madeleine Morgan for a free Discovery Session. We'll discuss your current challenges and abilities related to presenting, what you'd like to achieve, what is getting in the way and what resouces you need to present the way you would like to. C all Cambridge 01223 426392 or email mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk

22Oct/100

Confident and Skilful Presenting – Managing Your Content

One tried, tested and yet little known  way to organise the content of your presentation is to use the 4-Mat System

The 4-Mat System comes from a study of learning styles by Bernice McCarthy. By structuring your content in this way you’ll help all 4 kinds of learners and you are more likely to influence and engage the whole of your audience. When they are taking in information and learning, some people ask What? more than any other question, e.g. What is this about? Some people are more interested in the answer to the question, Why? Others are more interested in How? While others wonder, What if?

 Here’s how to sequence the material in your presentation to answer all these questions and help your audience get to grips with the topic:

  1. Give a ‘Small What?’ This is the subject heading and a few sentences describing the subject. E.g. ‘I’m going to talk about the 4-Mat System for organising the content in your presentation.’
  2. Follow the ‘Small What?’ with lots of ‘Why?’ because until the Why? People have a good reason to listen they will not pay attention. E.g. ‘This is important for you to learn because, if you use it, you are more likely to influence and engage your whole audience.’
  3. After the ‘Why?’ give your detailed information or Large ‘What?’. People need detail before they can think about how to use something or consider the implications. E.g. In the 4-Mat system, 4 learning styles have been identified...’
  4. Next talk about the ‘How?’ In a presentation, this might be talking about how they could implement the information in their departments, etc. E.g. ‘The sequence in which you use the 4-Mat System is…’
  5. Finally, look at the consequences. What would happen if you did this? What would happen if you didn’t? What would happen if you didn’t do this? What wouldn’t happen if you didn’t do this?  E.g. ‘If you don’t use this system a large section of the will not pay attention. People who are mainly ‘What if’ people need time to ask questions.

 Sometimes your audience will be made up of a majority of one category of learner.

For instance, more What If? People tend to be in marketing, sales and action-oriented managerial roles.

More How? People are in applied sciences and engineering.

More What? People are in natural sciences, maths, research and planning.

More Why? People tend to be in personnel training, organisational development, humanities and social sciences.

If you are presenting to audiences where there is a bias towards a particular learning style you need to tailor the balance of your presentation to suit it.

If you'd like some expert help with a presentation or public speaking engagement you've got coming up, please contact Madeleine Morgan 01223 426392 or email mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk for a free consultation. We'll discuss the presentation you want to give, what you want to achieve, what might get in the way of achieving your outcomes and what resources are available to help you deliver your presentation confidently and skilfully.

http://www.growu.co.uk and http://www.buildingselfconfidence.co.uk

22Oct/100

Confident Presenting – Public Speaking Mastery

 Why is it important to be a skilled public speaker and presenter?

Public speaking and presentations are still really important ways to increase your influencing and earing power from 1-2-1 to 1-2-many. If you could become a more powerful and effective public speaker, what would you do:

  • stand for Parliament,
  • inspire a team in your business,
  • earn a living out of public speaking
  • rally support for a good cause,
  • entertain your family and friends at a wedding
  • enhance your reputation as an expert,
  • make a difference in the world,
  • teach and train people,
  • promote your business
  • succeed in an interview
  • sell more
  • or…?

 The Number One Fear

In survey results, public speaking and presenting turn up as the number one things people fear – even more than death!

Even people who are confident and comfortable in themselves often find public speaking and presentations an ordeal. Perhaps because they know that if they make a mistake not only will there be lots of witnesses and but also they'll probably give themselves a hard time afterwards replaying the mistake in their minds long after everyone else has forgotten it.

Sometimes experienced public speakers can sabotage their presentations without even knowing it and many could get even better results with the secrets and systems you’re going to discover in the pages of this blog in the coming months and years.

 In these blog pages you’ll find out how to:

  • Give presentations with increased confidence and skill
  • Identify key factors that make presentations effective
  • Discover the unconscious ways presentations can be sabotaged and how to avoid them
  • Identify when to use different types of body language
  • Understand the what body language can give a presenter power and presence
  • Avoid the hidden barriers to getting your message across
  • And so much more…

If you'd like some expert help with a presentation or public speaking engagement you've got coming up, please contact Madeleine Morgan 01223 426392 or email mm@buildingselfconfidence.co.uk for a free consultation. We'll discuss the presentation you want to give, what you want to achieve, what might get in the way of achieving your outcomes and what resources are available to help you deliver your presentation confidently and skilfully.

http://www.growu.co.uk and http://www.buildingselfconfidence.co.uk

   
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